Friday, April 15, 2011

Conversation of Life and Love: 3rd part

There was this one time. There was life and there was love. Accidentally love gave life a visit…

 

Looking so surprised, life shouted a little: “Love! What makes you come here… again?”

Love replied with a quite confused face: “I come here to you after all these times and all you can say is just that? For heaven sake, Life!”

Life: “Indeed… I wasn’t expecting you at all. It’s so surprising!”

Love: “Well, it always happens this way, right? We both never know when, why, or how about my visit.”

Life: “That’s true, but you know what? Your visit, whether it’s a long one or not, always make me thinking and imagining in a constant and unstable way. I don’t like that.”

Love slightly punched life’s shoulder while saying: “Hey, Life! It all depends on you.”

Life emotionally and satirically replied: “Yeah, right! As if I am not unfair enough as a person. Everything always seems unfair to me, because every time you come to me, I know eventually I have to let you go. It hurts, it’s bitter, but I’ve got to be tough for myself, at least. Thus, it does NOT depend on me, Love.”

Love: “Okay, okay. I got your point. My question is if you know already that at the end you have to let me go away from you, why can’t you just simply embrace my presence? At least while I’m still here. I am quite sure you probably think it will be so harmful for your heart to do it, but don’t you want to take that risk? Come on! Admit it! YOU ARE LIFE! It is your part to take the risk, struggle, work your ass off, and get the big shit jerk along the way. I am sorry, but it’s true, right?”

Life realized that what love said was true, so life just nodded and added: “Yeah…”

With a bright smile, love held life tightly: “At least for now, my dearest best friend… We have our moment together when we agree on living harmoniously while I am still here.”

Slowly, life put a little smile on the face and said: “Hmm, yeah. While you are still here…”

Love: “And you are going to remember it as the time when love was here.”

Life: “Yes, the time when love was here… when you were here. Thanks, love!”

Love smiled again: “You are very much welcome, life!”

Friday, March 25, 2011

To the memories of my late aunt, Sila Said


My deepest sorry for missing so many moments together. My deepest sorry for letting you down so many times when you needed me. My deepest sorry for no proper farewell between us. 

This saturday, March 26, 2011 will be the 40th day of your commemoration. My warm hug and salutation for you, my dearest aunt.

                                May you rest in peace

Thursday, March 24, 2011

Sementara by Float

Sementara teduhlah hatiku
Tidak lagi jauh
Belum saatnya kau jatuh
Sementara ingat lagi mimpi
Juga janji janji
Jangan kau ingkari lagi

Percayalah hati lebih dari ini
Pernah kita lalui
Jangan henti disini

Sementara lupakanlah rindu
Sadarlah hatiku hanya ada kau dan aku
Dan sementara akan kukarang cerita
Tentang mimpi jadi nyata
Untuk asa kita ber dua

Percayalah hati lebih dari ini
Pernah kita lalui
Takkan lagi kita mesti jauh melangkah
Nikmatilah lara
Jangan henti disini 

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Conversation of Life and Love: 2nd part



Life: To me, to live means to put effort on what you want to get or achieve. What does it mean to you, Love?
Love: I do also agree with you, Life. But in my case, sometimes effort isn't really necessary. The importance is that we trust that there's God who may always put you on the best direction, though it is crappy and so, so amazingly unbelievable. That you think why it happens to you. Or why this "joke" is just getting too much. 
It is effortless...
So yes, you simply need to SURRENDER. To God, to the universe. 

Sunday, March 6, 2011

Freedom of Captivity


Secret. Silent. Lonesome. Timeless. Confusion. Stupidity. Addiction. Self - destruction. Painful happiness. Dying laugh. Sweet relinquish. 
Hello hell, it's so damn nice to finally meet you!  

Friday, February 4, 2011

Stripes of Melancholia

Friendship.
The word has been bothering my mind ever since last month. I question the truly meaning of it. Well, before I give you my own perspective, perhaps I should write the actual meaning. Literally, the word means the emotions or conduct of friends, the state of BEING FRIENDS, a relationship between friends, but here is the one that I like the most... a state of MUTUAL TRUST and SUPPORT between allied nations or I may say... persons, PEOPLE. In other words, it is an attachment, a unity, a harmony,... a mutual affection. 
My own perspective defines it as the state of knowing that there are these people whom you call "my friends" and you simply want them to be happy, just like you want yourself to be happy too. You need them not only when you need someone to console you anytime you feel down or someone to help you when you haven't studied anything for your exams, but you also do need them to KNOW and REALIZE... that you want to do the same thing for them. That you care about them. That honesty is NOT a difficult issue to share to each other. That you simply want to be there and around for them though times and space tell you the opposite. 
In my opinion, friendship is basically not that easy. Just like other things that color your life, it may go up and down. However, I think neither giving nor getting matter. Never. What really matter is openness and of course... understanding. Therefore, you must realize that if there's no mutual understanding on where exactly you SET THE BOUNDARIES between you and your friends, well then, never be surprised if a disaster comes along. You may want to give your 100% to this idea of friendship, but can your friends handle that? And... most importantly, can you and your pride handle the fact that it is actually too overwhelming for them? That they just really can't take it, yet they never let you understand the situation? So what's next? 
Well, take it from me (me as in my experience). When you are barely given the slightest chance to substantially analyze problems between you guys or just to know where possibly you may stand for them, but in a way never try to disturb them, then that is DEFINITELY the time you need to acknowledge that eventually... you are gonna be all alone, ON YOUR OWN. 
Trust me! You are just gonna seem so,so stupid and PATHETIC if you keep trying to understand it.

So, here it is! For you, my friends if you ever read this... I am sorry, really am sorry that I pull out my anger just because I never got that chance (and of course because I'm not a psychic who can read people's minds... OBVIOUSLY!), but somehow it has taught me to be humbly saying that I apologize if I have ever done anything wrong to you and even if I haven't, I sincerely apologize for letting this PROBLEM (God knew and always know, like you said, who actually did it right?) intrude our so-called- CLOSE FRIENDSHIP, probably forever... My deepest apology to you.



Saturday, January 22, 2011

Non Me Lo So Spiegare (Don't Know How To Explain It)

Some years ago during my exchange year in 2003 - 2004, this song was first introduced by Tiziano Ferro, a famous Italian singer with a deep and strong voice, emphasizing the meaning of the song. It is about relationship and how someone tries to make sense all the problems that come within, even the end of the relationship itself. Tragic, huh?


Un po' mi manca l'aria che tirava
I miss a bit the air that pulled
O semplicemente la tua bianca schiena
Or simply your white back
Nananana nananana

E quell'orologio non girava
And that watch didn't turn
Stava fermo sempre da mattina a sera
It was always stopped from morning to evening
Come me lui ti fissava
Like me, it stared at you
Io non piango mai per te
I never ever cry for you
Non faro' niente di simile no mai, nononono nononono
I will never ever do the same thing, nononono nononono
Si lo ammetto un po' ti penso
Yes, I admit
a bit that I think of you
Ma mi scanso non mi tocchi più
But I dodge that you don't touch me anymore

Solo che pensavo a quanto è inutile farneticare e credere di stare bene
Only that I thought how unnecessary raving and believing in feeling well
Quando è inverno e te
When it's winter and you
Togli le tue mani calde
Take away your warm hands
Non mi abbracci e mi ripeti che son grande
You don't hold me and you repeat me that I am big
Mi ricordi che rivivo in tante cose
You remember me that I relive in many things
Nananananana

Case, libri, auto, viaggi, fogli di giornale
Boxes, books, cars, trips, sheets of newspaper
Che anche se non valgo niente perlomeno a te
That even if I don't value anything at least to you
Ti permetto di sognare e se hai voglia di lasciarti camminare
I allow you to dream and if you have wish to let yourself walk
Scusa sai non ti vorrei mai disturbare
Sorry! You know, I would never ever want to disturb you
Ma vuoi dirmi come questo può finire...
But don't you wanna tell me how this may end...
Non me lo so spiegare io non me lo so spiegare
Dont know how to explain it, I don't know how to explain it

La notte fonda e la luna piena
The deep night and the full moon
Ci offrivano da dono solo l'atmosfera
They offered us only gift of the atmosphere
Ma l'amavo e l'amo ancora,
But I loved it and still love it,
Ogni dettaglio è aria che mi manca e se sto cosi' sarà la primavera
Every detail is an air that I miss and if I feel so then it will be spring time
Ma non regge più la scusa... No! No!
But it doesn't hold anymore excuse... No! No!
Solo che pensavo a quanto è inutile farneticare e credere di stare bene
Only that I thought how unnecessary raving and believing in feeling well
Quando è inverno e te
When it's winter and you
Togli le tue mani calde
Take away your warm hands
Non mi abbracci e mi ripeti che son grande
You don't hold me and you repeat me that I am big
Mi ricordi che rivivo in tante cose
You remember me that I relive in many things
Nananananana

Case, libri, auto, viaggi, fogli di giornale
Boxes, books, cars, trips, sheets of newspaper
Che anche se non valgo niente perlomeno a te
That even if I don't value anything at least to you
Ti permetto di sognare...
I allow you to dream...
Solo che pensavo a quanto è inutile farneticare e credere di stare bene
Only that I thought how unnecessary raving and believing in feeling well
Quando è inverno e te
When it's winter and you
Togli le tue mani calde
Take away your warm hands
Non mi abbracci e mi ripeti che son grande
You don't hold me and you repeat me that I am big
Mi ricordi che rivivo in tante cose
You remember me that I relive in many things
Ah nananananana

Case, libri, auto, viaggi, fogli di giornale
Boxes, books, cars, trips, sheets of newspaper
Che anche se non valgo niente perlomeno a te
That even if I don't value anything at least to you
Ti permetto di sognare e se hai voglia di lasciarti camminare
I allow you to dream and if you have wish to let yourself walk
Scusa sai non ti vorrei mai disturbare
Sorry! You know, I would never ever want to disturb you
Ma vuoi dirmi come questo può finire...
But don't you wanna tell me how this may end...
Eh ma vuoi dirmi come questo può finire
Hey, but don't you wanna tell me how this may end...
Si, ma vuoi dirmi come questo può finire...
Yes, but don't you wanna tell me how this may end...

You may download it through 4shared.com via this link:
http://www.4shared.com/audio/e1ROhzyq/Tiziano_Ferro_-_06_-_Non_Me_Lo.htm

Sunday, January 16, 2011

berteriak




Saya mau berteriak. Ya, saya benar benar ingin berteriak saja. Ya Tuhan, ya teman teman, ya dunia, saya ingin berteriak. Tapi saya rasa tidak ada wadah yang tepat untuk saya meneriakkan ini semua. Jadi saya rasa saya hanya akan berteriak di sini saja. Semoga tidak ada yang terganggu, tapi hati saya tetap bisa lega ketika saya bisa berteriak....
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
Ya, cukuplah itu... Nanti suara saya habis kalau berteriak terlalu banyak, kasihan dia kalau terlalu lelah, sama lelahnya seperti kota Jakarta, sama lelahnya seperti dunia ini, sama lelahnya seperti hati dan pikiran ini. Jadi lebih baik saya sudahi saja sampai di sini. Lagipula hati saya sudah cukup lega. Saya yakin. Ya, saya rasa. Saya berharap. Terima kasih.
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Sunday, December 26, 2010

Between Cinta, Rasa, or... Drama

When you don't know if it is right or wrong when you're with him, but you know that you wanna be with him all the time? What is it? Cinta, Rasa, or Drama?
When you're extremely jealous with his boyfriends or girlfriends that he spends much more time with them than with you and even make you imagining the most ridicilous things ever? What is it? Cinta, Rasa, or Drama?
When he seems very ordinary to you, yet his absence can make u down and low? What is it? Cinta, Rasa, or Drama?
When he never actually shake your heart to the core, but you can never put your attention off of your cellphones, expecting his call or text? What is it? Cinta, Rasa, or Drama?


Well, actually I don't know what exactly it is, but probably if I were you, I'd say that it's just a Drama. Why? Because people love making drama in their lives and these situations  are just some of the circumstances that they can use as excuses to make drama of drooling or drowning or such. People become fools when they fall in love simply because they make a drama out of it. Once my friend said that this life is just so simple and I guess so is love. We just need to stop over analyzing or questioning everything we are blessed with. If you have feelings for someone or better yet, you fall in love, then so be it. Admit it, enjoy it, seize it, treasure it! Period! End of story... =)
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Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Conversation of life and love

Once upon a time, there's life and there's love. One day they meet...
Life: why is it that i've never met you before?
Love: well, i don't know actually, because it is not up to me. It is up to the universe, but I guess maybe we meet because it is simply the right time for us to meet
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